Irie Chic*

My New Blog

2012-01-14T08:53:00.001-08:00

Shameless Plug

Remember to check out my new blog www.cultivatedchic.com.

Have a wonderful weekend!

Announcement + New Beginnings

2012-01-08T16:21:00.000-08:00

Hey Lovelies,

This is the last post on Irie Chic. It was a hard decision for me to make, but one I must make. I have enjoyed having a personal style blog for over 2 years. When I first started this blog, I had no idea I would get the chance to meet so many amazing people and partake in such wonderful experiences. All because of blogging. This year alone, I got the chance to meet Rebecca Minkoff and also got a free and oh so beautiful Bob Mackie piece.

As you may have noticed, I have posted non-fashion/style related posts on Irie Chic, because there were times I couldn't help but talk about some of the things on my mind, which is why I have decided to end Irie Chic. I need to have a blog that encompasses all (or most) of my interests. A blog that excites and challenges me. As a result, I have decided to create a new blog - one that is more inclusive and integrates a variety of my interests. Will there be style/fashion posts on the new blog? Of course, but there will also posts about a number of other topics. I am really excited about it and would really love for you to join me over there at Cultivated Chic. Please also check out my other blog, Black Fashion Bloggers, which will remain open.

Thank you so much for reading, commenting, sending me messages, understanding, and just being awesome. I will leave Irie Chic open for about a month and then I will be closing the blog. Again I want to thank you, come on over and join me at Cultivated Chic :).

Cheers,
Nika

Blog Sale

2012-01-04T19:54:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year Lovelies!!!!

What better time to clear out a closet than in the New Year. I am gradually clearing out my closet and have decided to put a few pieces on Ebay. Feel free to check them out HERE. I will be adding items gradually.

Here are some of the things on sale:

Zara Faux Fur Jacket

Vintage Oxfords

Flat Boots

Everything is in GREAT condition!!!

Irie Chic's Year in Review: Closet 2011

2011-12-28T20:42:00.000-08:00

I got this idea from the lovely ladies of the 4Aces blog. Great idea and post ladies!!!! So here are some outfits worn by me this year:

It has been an awesome year of blogging.

Cheers!

Nika

Updates and New Beginnings

2011-12-28T09:23:00.000-08:00

Hey Lovelies!!!

-How are you? I just got back from visiting with family in Florida and am now trying to keep warm in New York. I just love New York, gonna take some time to catch up with family and friends, see the tree in Rockefeller Center and visit my favorite vintage shops.

-This is somewhat late, but the winner of the third giveaway is Localceleb!!!! Congrats lady, please send me your contact info so I can send your prize.

So the New Year will be bringing about some new changes in terms of the blog. As I've said before, having a blog has been a joy for me. I have met people and done things that I probably wouldn't have experienced without Irie Chic!!! As I begin to enter a new phase in my life (graduation is right around the corner!), I would also like to enter a new phase in blogging ;). I will be starting a new blog. Irie Chic, will be open for a little while longer until then. I am really excited about the new blog and will post the address and link as soon as I am done putting my ideas together. I would love for you to join me!!!

So Stay tuned ;)

Nika

Merry Christmas Lovelies!!!!

2011-12-25T11:37:00.001-08:00

I have been in Florida for the past couple of days celebrating the holiday season with my sister and family. Here are a few pics that we took while we were out celebrating the season. I hope you are having a very Merry Christmas with your friends and family. Merry Christmas to you!!!!

My Christmas Wishlist

2011-12-22T20:26:00.001-08:00

Sunday Best

2011-12-18T13:00:00.000-08:00

Dress: Barneys NY

Blazer: Express

Boots: Franco Sarto

Necklace: F21

I plan to wear my hair in protective styles this winter (braids etc.), but I tend to miss my hair when I wear extensions. I'm glad to have my fro out again, I missed it so.

me and the fro this weekend

“Service is the rent we pay for the privilege of living on this earth.” Shirley Chisholm

Winner + Giveaway #3!!!!

2011-12-16T18:21:00.000-08:00

The winner of the gorgeous earrings are Nicey, Congrats Nicey!!!!! Please send me your info so I can mail the earrings.

For giveawy #3, you have a chance to win a lip glaze set from Stila (pictured below).

The Rules:

ow here are the rules:

1. Follow Irie Chic via Google Reader.

2. Following via Twitter or Youtube gets you an extra entry (more chance of winning)

3. Comment on this post letting me know how you are following Irie Chic

4. The winner will be chosen randomly, and the giveaway is open to readers worldwide.

5. The Giveaway ends on December 22, 2011 at Midnight EST.

Mini Haul Vlog

2011-12-16T05:53:00.001-08:00

Love on Top Cover (These Girls Are Amazing)

2011-12-14T19:55:00.001-08:00

...and they're only 11 and 13.

The First Year (singleness)

2011-12-13T21:42:00.000-08:00

Recently it hit me. It's the first year. My first year of complete singleness. "Oh wow", I thought "How did I not realize this before." Well it's been over a year now, my realization came back in November, a month after the official year passed.

Since I was a teenager I've either always had a boyfriend or was actively dating someone. In that time, my longest period of being completely unattached- as in not dating or being in a relationship- lasted a mere few months.

I didn't see anything wrong with it, never really actively thought about it. I figured I was young and it was just a normal part of life. I am not saying there is anything wrong with getting to know or dating people now, but when I look back, some of those attachments were unwarranted......you live and you learn.

After my last relationship ended last October, I didn't make an active decision not to date. In fact, I went out on dates a few months later, but after two first dates with two different men where I left feeling no connection, I just didn't feel quite up to it.

Further, God was really moving in my life. I decided I was going to renew my commitment to my faith and spend time with me.; so far it's been quite the year! I've learned so much about myself and feel like I know myself in ways that I never did before. I am much closer to God, to family, and to friends. Instead of a relationship, my hobbies and other pursuits take up most of my time now. I have not shed any tears over a man or sat worrying over one.

I have enjoyed coming home and enjoying my own company. I have also enjoyed not having to think about another person's whereabouts or feeling like I had to make a phone call or send a text. I have enjoyed numerous other selfish indulgences my singleness affords. I, Miss Always Involved, am actually enjoying being unattached.

I've had moments, moments when I miss being in a relationship, but they have been fleeting.

I want my next relationship to happen in God's timing, my constant prayer to God is to protect me from counterfeits and let His will be done in my life. Now more than ever before, I know what I want. I know what I bring to the table, I am not perfect, but I know I have a whole lot to offer. I know what values and character traits are extremely important to me. I know what I deserve, as a woman and as a woman of God.

Being in a loving relationship is beautiful, and I want to experience that when the time is right. No longer do I want to be involved, I want the real thing. There's nothing like the real thing, and there's no time like the right time. This time, it's all about God's time.

Cheers!

Nika

New Accessories

2011-12-13T21:05:00.001-08:00

Throwback Friday

2011-12-09T09:47:00.001-08:00

Beginning of the semester fun

Winner + Giveaway #2

2011-12-08T19:37:00.000-08:00

I am happy to announce the winner of the first giveaway, Fisiwoman!!!! Congrats Fisiwoman on winning the L'Occitane Verbena Body Lotion.

Now on to Giveaway #2. As you ladies know, I love big earrings, so for this giveaway you have the chance to win a beautiful pair of big celebrity inspired earrings. These earrings are from one of my favorite youtubers Etsy store, she has a lot of beautiful jewelry for sale here. The earrings:

Now here are the rules:

1. Follow Irie Chic via Google Reader.
2. Following via Twitter or Youtube gets you an extra entry (more chance of winning)

3. Comment on this post letting me know how you are following Irie Chic

4. The winner will be chosen randomly, and the giveaway is open to readers worldwide.

5. The Giveaway ends on December 14, 2011 at Midnight EST.

OOTD: Video Post

2011-12-08T10:23:00.001-08:00

Studious

2011-12-06T20:22:00.000-08:00

I got these shorts last year and really liked them; yet they've become one of the forgotten pieces in my closet. This morning I pulled them out and had no idea what I wanted to wear with them so I went to www.polyvore.com and got inspired by this set:

I just love polyvore for inspiration!

This outfit made me feel very studious, so I had some fun playing around with these "nerdy chic" glasses I got in Soho NYC last year

all ready to go!

Zara shirt
Club Monaco black mesh sweater
Zara shorts
Banana Republic Boots

Life as I know it

2011-12-05T13:58:00.001-08:00

In the library studying for finals

These are the best!

It's that time

2011-12-04T16:09:00.000-08:00

Hey Lovelies,

I am currently studying away for finals. I will be done in 2 weeks (can't wait). Here's a quick outfit post

Blazer: Banana Republic

Leggings: F21

Shoes: Zara

Top: gift from friend
Belt: Vintage

Remember to enter the giveaway from the previous post:). Also check out the new feature on my second blog, black fashion bloggers, HERE.

Giveaway #1

2011-11-30T20:53:00.000-08:00

When I started Irie Chic, I was nervous. I didn't really know anything about having a style blog. I wasn't sure if I wanted to "put myself out there." Despite my initial worries, I created this blog. I am so happy that I did! Through Irie Chic, I have met wonderful people and have had great experiences.

More than anything, I am so grateful for all of you who continue to read. As a busy law student, sometimes I am not able to post as much as I want to post. From the bottom of my heart, I want to thank you for reading, commenting and messaging. It means a lot to me, and I don't take any of it for granted. :)

For the month of December I really want to show you my appreciation. Thereore I will be conducting four giveaways this month. One each week!!!!! I am so excited!

So now for the first giveaway! I will be giving away one bottle of L'Occitane Verbena Body Lotion.

I love the lemony fresh scent of this body lotion and know you will too.

Now here are the rules:

1. Follow Irie Chic via Google Reader.
2. Following via Twitter or Youtube gets you an extra entry (more chance of winning)

3. Comment on this post letting me know how you are following Irie Chic and name one thing you are grateful for.

4. The winner will be chosen randomly, and the giveaway is open to readers worldwide.

5. The Giveaway ends on December 7, 2011 at Midnight EST.

Songs of Life

2011-11-28T21:43:00.000-08:00

I don't know if I mentioned this before, but I LOVE gospel music. Gospel songs always lift my spirit and remind me of my blessings. Some of my favorite songs:

I heart them

2011-11-28T15:42:00.000-08:00

Hey Lovelies,

How was your Thanksgiving? I was in New York spending time with family and friends. Now I am back in D.C. preparing for the finals season. It's always difficult to go through, but so great when it's over! I really want to go to Jamaica for the Christmas holidays. It would be the perfect after finals break. We shall see.

Spending time with those I love at Thanksgiving. BTW, I recently discovered the Instagram App., and I am having loads of fun with it.

Vintage Gold

2011-11-21T16:30:00.000-08:00

I got this vintage top from one of my favorite Ebay sellers. Btw, remember the hurtful situation I talked about in my previous post, well it's all working out great. God is so good ya'll!

Vintage Top: Ebay

Skirt: Topshop

Shoes: Aldo

Over the Knee Boots

2011-11-20T15:12:00.000-08:00

Last night I went out to dinner with friends, here's what I wore

All ready to go!

It was a really tough week for me last week. I experienced something that was really upsetting and hurtful. I thank God for his grace, as always I am bringing the situation to him in prayer. I know I will have to stand in faith no matter how things may seem. He is never let me down, and I know he wont now.

"He will never leave me nor forake me."

Boots: Colin Stuart

Blazer Thrifted BCBG

Clutch: Vintage

Leggings: Necessary Clothing

Coat: Old Navy

What's Your favorite Lauryn Hill Song?

2011-11-20T11:23:00.001-08:00

I am currently listening to Ms. Hill, and while I seriously love all her songs, Ex-Factor is my favorite hands down. What about you?

Pink +Leopard

2011-11-17T18:43:00.000-08:00

"A man’s gift makes room for him, And brings him before great men."

Blazer: Banana Republic (Thrifted)

Pants: Zara

Leopard Print Flats

Random Brand Top (purchased at Urban Outfitters)

Wedge Heel Boots

2011-11-16T07:19:00.000-08:00

I've been searching for a pair of wedge heeled boots. I really like he one below that I found on aldos.com. I like wedges, not only do they give you the pizazz that comes with wearing heels, they are comfortable and suits my on-the-go student lifestyle. Aren't they chic?

Tweeding It

2011-11-12T16:59:00.000-08:00

Dressed and ready to go run my weekend errands

Tweed Blazer: American Eagle

Shorts: F21

Sweaater: Gap

Boots: Zara

necklace: F21

Cigarette Pants

2011-11-08T16:22:00.000-08:00

I found the wool coat I have been looking for! I wanted a bright colored coat (love stand-out coats), though I saw many that I loved, I couldn't find one within my price range. Until I saw this one on OldNavy.Com. It looked pink on the website, but I kinda like this orangey color. It fits just right and looks great. Plus, I have some good news, it's now on sale just click this LINK

Pants: Zara

Top: Express

Shoes: White Mountain

earrings: Vintage (Ebay)

Necklace (purchased at Macys 2 years ago)

On Vulnerability...

2011-11-07T23:04:00.000-08:00

I just finished watching Why Did I Get Married? for the second time. I guess we always miss something the first time watching a movie huh, because this time around a conversation among friends really intrigued me. Three of the leading female characters met for lunch, two of them needed advice from the other who is a Psychologist. They are both at a low point in their marriage and desperately want to reach out to their husbands. Their friend the Psychologist thinks the solution is pretty single, she advises them to let their husbands know they love them and want to work things out. At first, the two women are uncomfortable with that advice. It's scary and risky, it would make them vulnerable.

This scene makes me think about vulnerability and how hard it is for many of us. It is indeed scary to open yourself to another human being, especially if there is a possibility that rejection could be the outcome. Yet it is so necessary. If I could define vulnerability, I would say it's being true to your feelings. It's being open and speaking from the heart. It's admitting we need each other, even if we are used to being independent. It's the ability to look on another person and say, "I love you, need you, and really appreciate you."

Yet many of us don't say or show those very things because we are afraid or we are too proud, or......Sometimes our refusal to be truthful result in "what ifs, and should have and could haves." I do think vulnerability is a necessary part of real and truthful relationships. I am glad that the two women decided to take their friend's advice at the end. They extended the olive branch and began the work to salvage relationships they wanted. They were honest. Many of us have been told over and over while we were growing up, "speak the truth." Good advice! Speak it even when it makes you feel vulnerable.

Necessary Leggings

2011-11-07T21:31:00.000-08:00

These pictures were actually taken a few weeks ago on the weekend after my birthday celebration. I snapped them after my friends and I had Sunday Brunch at Ben's Next Door. I really like these leggings - the look and the fit. I wish I had purchased another pair in a different design on my last trip to Necessary Clothing. Hopefully, they'll have more when I go again for another visit.

Top: Zara (via Ebay)

Blazer: Express

Leggings: Necessary Clothing

Shoes: Tahari

Bag: LV

New Theme Song

2011-11-06T18:24:00.000-08:00

"Brown skin, coily hair, plump lips..."

My A to Z

2011-11-01T09:12:00.000-07:00

The A to Z of Nika

So I got this idea from another blog, Nikstar Was Here, and I thought it would be fun to do. So here goes:

A. Age: 20-something ;)

B. Bed size: Queen.
C. Chore that you hate: Mopping...eek!
D. Dogs: I really want a Yuppie.
E. Essential start to your day: Prayer and Coffee...I need these two
F. Favorite color: To look at Pink, to wear--Cream
G. Gold or Silver: Silver
H. Height: 5'8, all legs
I. Instruments you play: Does the recorder count?
J. Job title: Full-time law student and Research Assistant
K. Kids: not yet
L. Live: Chocolate City!
M. Mother’s name: Olive
N. Nicknames: My family calls me Neeks
O. Overnight hospital stays: Thankfully none, if you don't count when I was born
P. Pet peeves: rudeness
Q. Quote from a movie: "Stupid is as stupid does" Forest Gump
R. Right or left handed: both!
S. Siblings: 3 sisters, 1 brother
U. Underwear: lace boy shorts
V. Vegetable you hate: I am having a hard time thinking of any, I actually like my veggies ;)
W. What makes you run late: I can take forever to get ready.
X. X-Rays you’ve had: Dental, eyes, feet.
Y. Yummy food that you make: Jamaican curry chicken.
Z. Zoo animal:Flamingos. They're really purty

So what's your A to Z?

Camel Vest

2011-10-30T10:25:00.000-07:00

I purchased this vest at H&M last week while I was in NYC.

It has gotten quite cold in D.C., yesterday we had snow, but today is a bright sunny almost looks like summer kinda day. It's cold though, which makes me remember that I need a new wool coat. Let me know if you have any suggestions ;)

Sweater: Gap

Vest: H&M

Jeans: Uniqlo

Boots: Random (purchased at Necessary Clothing in Soho, NY)

Orange Pop

2011-10-26T20:47:00.000-07:00

Untitled from Nika on Vimeo.

A professional look as I had to teach today

Thrifted Jacket

Thrifted top

Zara Pants

Tahari Shoes

Earrings - purchased from vendor in D.C.

Hair Update

2011-10-26T07:23:00.000-07:00

April 2011

6 months later, October 2011

The fro is growing ya'll!!!!

The Girl With the Great Hair

2011-10-23T11:49:00.000-07:00

At this moment, I am on the bus headed to NY for my friend's jewelry party. The great thing about bus rides is that you can get a lot of work done, and I do have some law school reading I need to do. This morning as I was waiting for the bus I asked a guy to hold my place in line for me. As I was walking away, his friend said "Of course we got you, you're the girl with the great hair." Aww, I love it when men show appreciation for natural hair!

I spent the day yesterday at Howard University's homecoming. Though I have been in D.C. for two years, this was my first time on the campus. I had a great time meeting people, eating great food and listening to Howard alums reminisce .

Blog Award

2011-10-22T20:23:00.000-07:00

I want to thank the lovely Rebecca of LocalCeleb for this fabulous award!

HERE ARE SOME OF THE RULES FOR THIS AWARD:

COMPLETE THE QUESTIONS BELOW

SHARE 7 RANDOM FACTS ABOUT YOURSELF

LINK BACK TO THE PERSON THAT GAVE YOU THE AWARD

PASS THE AWARD OVER TO 10 OF YOUR FELLOW BLOGGERS AND LET THEM KNOW THAT YOU GAVE IT TO THEM

NAME YOUR FAVORITE SONG: A Secret Place, Karen Clark Sheard

NAME YOUR FAVORITE DESSERT: Strawberry Cheesecake

WHAT PISSES YOU OFF: Injustice of all kinds

WHEN YOU'RE UPSET, YOU: Can get a bit snarky, though I try to be as graceful as possible

YOUR FAVORITE PET: I don't have a pet, but I do want a Yuppie, they are so adorable!

BLACK OR WHITE: I like the look of white against brown skin

YOUR BIGGEST FEAR: failure

BEST FEATURE: My warm brown eyes ;)

EVERYDAY ATTITUDE: Optimistic

WHAT IS PERFECTION: God's creation

GUILTY PLEASURE: Trashy reality t.v.!!!

Inspired Saturday Night

2011-10-22T20:12:00.000-07:00

Relaxing at home, browsing tumblr - found these photos and decided to share

Birthday Fun

2011-10-20T21:09:00.000-07:00

Pics from my birthday celebration last week

New Earrings

2011-10-18T09:06:00.000-07:00

I purchased these earrings from my friend who sells jewelry, I *heart* them. I think they go well with my teenie weenie afro.

Sexy Money

2011-10-17T11:01:00.000-07:00

I think this is something worth speaking about especially in the fashion/style blogging world.

As I've stated before many times on the blog since its inception, I am fiscally conservative when it comes to buying clothes. In other words, I have no problem hunting for a deal. Hence I love Ebay, consignment shops, and sales and discount stores (Marshalls anyone?)

I am a student on a budget, and I try my best to ensure my purchases fall within that budget. Following/having fashion blogs can and do entice the consumerist in people. Whether it's making a big designer purchase a particular fashion blogger has or buying new items to display on your blog. If you are not careful, being a reader and author of a fashion blog can be a strain on your wallet.

While I have no problem taking risks with style, this is one area that I will advise to err on the side of caution. You do not need hundred and thousands of dollars worth of clothing, bags and shoes to be stylish. You can easily be stylish on/within a budget.

As a result from now on I will ensure to include where I purchased an item that I am wearing (not just the brand). You will notice that a lot of the things in my closet are from Ebay or vintage/consignment shops.

At the end of the day, bad credit, huge amount of bad debt and the likes aren't sexy. Our financial well-being is way more important that a designer shoe or bag.

So from the mouth of a fiscally conservative style blogger, "saving is sexy."

Just Add a Blazer

2011-10-14T14:44:00.000-07:00

Thanks so much for the birthday wishes, it means a lot to me :)

Today I had to teach, it's casual Friday, but I don't like to get too casual when I go and teach a high school class, especially because people often assume I am much younger than I am. I wore jeans but decided to dress it up a bit with blazer and heels. I think blazers are the quickest way to add a touch of sophistication to a look, that's why I love them. I got the top as a gift from my friend Sasha. She works in fashion and has the best collection of clothing...ever. I am actually trying to get her to stat a blog. I digress. Tonight I am going to celebrate my friends' birthday, and tomorrow is my birthday celebration. I'll make sure to take pics!

I added a blazer to complete the look

Top: gift from friend

Jeans: Zara

Boots: White Mountain

Vintage Michael Kors Boyfriend Blazer

Random Brand Belt

Birthday Post

2011-10-13T17:20:00.000-07:00

It's my birthday!!!!

Just doing a quick post before I run out and get some ice-cream/cupcake to celebrate. I have been in school the whole day, and I am really excited that my friends are coming to D.C. this weekend to celebrate with me. I am incredibly blessed and thankful to God for his many blessings! Here's to anther wonderful birthday!!!

NY Weekend

2011-10-10T17:54:00.000-07:00

I just got back to D.C from New York where I spent the holiday weekend. Speaking of holiday weekend, the weather was awesome, it felt like summer in October - with temps as high as 80!!! On Saturday I went to my friend "Goodbye NYC" dinner, she's moving to San Francisco in a few days, I'll miss her. We have great memories together in NY, but now I finally have an excuse to visit the West Coast - it's long overdue.

I am wearing a Topshop Romper, Ziggy NY Shoes and Chunky Necklace

Just Chill

2011-10-04T21:12:00.000-07:00

I don't really get to wear casual clothes to school often anymore - not with teaching high school students the law 2-3 days per week. About half of my week is spent in more business/professional wear (will make sure to do posts in my teaching gear). Today was a casual day for me and in true relaxed form, I grabbed the first pair of leggings I could find.

Leggings: random

Top: Banana Republic

Boots: Zara

In other news, I am back in the gym after a long overdue break. I am aiming to get really fit and toned. Body inspirations? Eva Mircelle and Kelly Rowland

Chunky Necklaces

2011-10-04T12:27:00.000-07:00

I am currently having a love affair with chunky necklaces like the ones being worn by Rachel Roy and Kylie.

They make such a statement.

I just bought this one on Ebay, can't wait to wear it.

Maxi Dresses: Sister Style

2011-09-29T15:48:00.000-07:00

These pictures were taken back in August at my sister's wedding rehearsal, we didn't plan on it, somehow we both ended up wearing maxi dresses

International Couture Collection

2011-09-28T11:04:00.000-07:00

This past Sunday, I attended the International Couture Collection at the French Embassy in D.C. This event is the grand finale of D.C. Fashion Week. The show featured various designers from all over the world with designs ranging from formal to funky. The show was well attended by D.C.'s fashion community.

Pictures from the Show

One of my favorite collections from the show was IndianPrincess - colorful, funky, and bold:

Red Carpet Ready

Here I am! I'm wearing a Romper (via Lulus.com), Vintage YSL vest and BCBG shoes

Does Dating Require A Dress Code?

2011-09-27T15:44:00.000-07:00

Just read this very interesting and thought-provoking article on Coco & Creme, what do you think?

AUGUST 29, 2011 FASHION

Does Dating Require A Dress Code?

It seems there’s no end to the demanding challenges that we juggle daily. We have to be at work at a certain time, we have to pick up the kids when they get out of school, we have appointments and events we must attend. This list is so exhaustive that style, when we’re at our leisure, becomes that one area of self-expression we can manage on our own terms. Fashion is one of the greatest and purest ways through which we express our mood, personality and creativity.
But even that is sometimes compromised when women enter relationships. The thinking is that a good woman wants to provide for her man in any way possible; however, does that desire have to extend to the way she chooses to dress? Isn’t that a very personal process and decision? Believe it or not, many women are facing the dilemma of dressing for their man today and I am not afraid to say that I was once one of these women.

“Sweatpants, hair tied, chillin’ with no make-up on, That’s when you’re the prettiest, I hope that you don’t take it wrong.” Drake’s popular line was one I always admired and truly identified with until my whole look changed for a man.

I have always been a no boundaries kind of gal when it came to fashion. Bright colors, fun jewelry, flats and jeans were my uniform.

My man claimed to love me, but he couldn’t stand my look. He always preferred for me to wear skirts and wanted me to wear more neutral colors. At the time, I didn’t see this as a problem; I mean why wouldn’t I change my style if it could make my boyfriend happy? But as I reflect on it today, I cannot believe that I had compromised myself to abide by his standards.

When I changed elements of my style for a man, I compromised who I am. When we broke up, I promised myself I’d never do that again.

Now, as I proudly walk down the street in my neon green jumpsuit and plum sandals, it’s clear that those days of compromising my style and my personality are far behind me.

However, I am troubled when I come in to contact with women who have given up their sense of style to cater to a man like I did.

Why are we so quick to do that?

Now, there is nothing wrong with looking good for your man. I am by all means a strong advocate of this. However, I am a stronger advocate of looking good for yourself first. How are we as women suppose to gain respect if we are so quick to give up our parts of who we are to please our mates?

I believe that real men would never pressure a woman into dressing differently than she desires to. It’s a form of control that we shouldn’t stand for.

Ladies, have you ever changed the way you dressed for a man or adhered to his “dress code”? Have you ever asked your man to change his style? How did he react?

-Julissa Escobosa

Colorblocking

2011-09-25T08:57:00.000-07:00

Here I am at a friend's house party. I much rather house parties/gatherings than parties in other settings. I like talking/connecting with others in a small comfortable setting.

I bought my necklace from a vendor at the H Street festival I posted about previously. It has become one of my favorite statement pieces, I need to find this p[articular vendor. She had gorgeous pieces of jewelry.

If this was a painting I would name it "self-capture" lol

Top: random

skirt: urban outfitters

shoes: Ziggy Shoes

Fun Times

2011-09-24T09:56:00.000-07:00

It's CBC (Congressional Black Caucus) weekend in D.C.!!! CBC is an exciting time in D.C.especially for those who like to go out, socialize and make connections. There are various networking/social events and parties taking place. Since Wednesday I have been out and about enjoying CBC festivities, here are a few pics:

Dress: Random brand)

Shoes: Office (via Topshop)

networking

I am wearing a vintage sheath dress, Carlos Santana Shoes and LV bag

Tomorrow I'll be attending the International Couture Collections at the french Embassy. I am very excited about it!!!

It's Too Bad 'Cause Love is Blind

2011-09-20T10:13:00.000-07:00

I have been listening to this song on replay since I heard it on a natural hair video I watched on youtube.

On Sunday night I saw my friend C. at a Christian Youth Fellowship. As we conversed, I couldn't help but notice how chic she looked, I just had to snap a pic of her outfit.

out and about in D.C. (U street area)

Blazer: Express

Leggings: AA

Shoes: Carlos Santana

Top: Random (via JC Penny's)

BTW, I am on the market for a new camera. My camera, for lack of a better word, SUCKS. I would love your suggestions ;)

H Street Festival D.C.

2011-09-17T18:27:00.000-07:00

Today I went to D.C.'s H street festival. It was fun and chock full of all sorts of activities including a fashion show and other performances:

Enjoying an icy

Fall In Love With Flowers from Fatima

2011-09-17T01:01:00.000-07:00

Hey Lovelies,

I am pleased to announce that Irie Chic is teaming up with Flowers from Fatima! Flowers from Fatima is a line of chic hair accessories for women. Fatima's lovely creations are great for a special occasion or to spice up any hairstyle from a twist-out to a chignon. They are also a great way to add a haute touch to your Fall wardrobe. I think these pieces from her collection are especially great for spicing up any Fall look:

Almond Brown Mum Flower Hair Clips

Honeycomb Floral Hair Stick

So for the good news!!!

From now until Saturday, September 23, all my lovely readers get to enjoy 30% off at Flowers from Fatima by entering code IrieChic30.

Happy Shopping!!!!

Leisure

2011-09-16T20:06:00.000-07:00

Last night I went out with my friends from law school. I have been as busy as a bee since school started so it was fun just to let my hair down for a night. I promised myself I am going to make time for leisure my last year no matter how busy I get. I am really planning to deliver on that promise.

I got my outfit from Necessary Clothing in Soho, NY. I really like that store, it's such a great place to grab a quick and inexpensive look for a night out. In other news, I bought a new blush called Rose D'Oro by Milani. It's a pretty pink color with a little shimmer, it's very pretty. Go get it ;).

Letting my hair down

I am wearing the blush I referenced above. I love the color on my skin

Snippets

2011-09-15T09:00:00.000-07:00

Satin Tank - Thrifted

Lace Tank - Forever21

Jeans - Uniqlo

Shoes: Hive and Honey (via Piperlime)

Solo Child at Fashion Week

2011-09-13T16:27:00.000-07:00

What I like most about Solange's style is that she takes fashion risks. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but I like that she is not boxed in by the norm and has fun with clothing. Her style has definitely developed into that of a Brooklynite - self-expressive, bold, risky. Brooklyn will do it to you, lol. I have been watching her different looks during this Fashion Week and all I can say is "go ahead Solange, you are doing the darn thing."

Hey!

2011-09-10T07:53:00.000-07:00

Hey Lovelies!!!!

How are you guys? Well I have a few updates

-I have started my last year of law school, woo-hoo!!! Time really flies! I am excited and nervous at the same time, this is a really important school year for me, I can't wait to see what's in store.

-This year I am taking a law school clinic called Street Law where I get to teach high school students the law. It's challenging, but extremely rewarding, but so far I love it! I also really have a newfound respect for teachers, hats off!

-I am loving my braids, lol

So here I am out in D.C. after having lae night breakfast at Kramer's

I knew I had to get this dress when I saw it on the rack at Forever 21. It is definitely vintage inspired (and ya'll know I love vintage) and the cut out in the back is just too cute!

Fav looks from the VMAs

2011-08-29T09:16:00.000-07:00

My former Destiny's Child lovelies,

Kelly looked absolutely stunning from head to toe. Her hair, makeup, and get up! Gorg

Congrats to Bey and J! Bey has the mommy to be glow - she looks beautiful!

CONFIDENCE 101

2011-08-24T07:32:00.000-07:00

I found this post on a blog I recently discovered and love, www.blacknbougie.com. I absolutely love this post and thought I'd share:

Confidence 101
1. Figure out who you are. The good, the bad and the ugly

2. Be okay with number one

3. Understand that not everybody else is at number two.

4. Give not a damn about those people mentioned in number three.

5. Leave your house as if you are being filmed. Even if you aren't looking hot, walk like you are rocking the hell out of those basketball shorts and wife beater. Head up, shoulders back, easy stride. Fellas, ladies, it's so not bougie to shuffle along like you're on your way to prison.

6. Smile. I know you don't feel like it. Do it anyway.

7. Speak. Even if you're not spoken to. "How are you doing today?" If they don't answer, nod and keep it moving.

8. Make eye contact. Number 5, 6, & 7 mean nothing without this.

9. About number seven, have something to say in case someone follows up. "Umm" is S.No.S. (So Not Sexy)

10. Never, ever, ever let 'em see you sweat. Your insecurities, your bad day, your baggage from your last relationship needs to stay strapped down and tucked away for private time. As a friend of mine used to say, don't carry your funk on your face.

VLOG: My Style Story

2011-08-18T10:47:00.000-07:00

Video Inspired by Channing of Channing in the City. I would love to hear your style story, so I am inviting all style/fashion bloggers to participate by making a style story video.

Also, please check out the fabulous ladies featured on my second blog http://blackfashionbloggers.blogspot.com/

Recreate

2011-08-18T06:33:00.000-07:00

I MUST recreate this look for Fall

photo courtesy of Vogue Black

She's Married Now!!!!

2011-08-15T11:59:00.000-07:00

This past Saturday, I had the honor of being the Maid of Honor in my sister's wedding. The wedding was spectacular lovelies, and I've never seen a more beautiful bride. I am so happy for my sister and her husband, they are made for each other.

sis and I

The beautiful bride all ready to go

first dance as husband and wife

Sis, Mom, and I

sis and her hubby

Enjoying the Florida Sun

2011-08-11T06:47:00.000-07:00

Linen Pants: Zara

Wedges: Aldo

Top: Random

Black Fashion Bloggers

2011-08-11T06:14:00.000-07:00

Hi Lovelies,

I have created a second blog, http://blackfashionbloggers.blogspot.com, to highlight black bloggers and black style/fashion. I am really excited about this new blog, and would love for you guys to read/follow. Please join the site when you get a chance. Click HERE to join.

Nika

Until Now

2011-08-10T06:01:00.000-07:00

I "discovered" this pic in my camera that I took a few months ago. I kinda like this outfit ;)

Shirt: Zara

Shorts: F21

Shoes: Ziggy NY

Bag: LV

Like the Rent is Due!

2011-08-08T18:18:00.000-07:00

The lovely Malinda Williams, she looks stunning!!!

On Hair: Why Natural Hair Must Be a Viable Choice

2011-07-26T16:15:00.000-07:00

Him: "You seem so conservative"

Me: "Really, natural hair and all?"

Him: "But you're Jamaican!"

I chuckled, I found it somewhat refreshing and somewhat odd that he had equated my teeny weeny afro to my nationality, to my "Jamaicaness."

Looking back, I can't help but wonder if he knows the same Jamaica I knew. Admittedly some things (a lot of things) have changed since I left over a decade ago. Yet some things probably still remain the same....

In my memory of my childhood spent in Jamaica hair is not really at the forefront of my recollection. I do remember that almost all the women I knew wore a relaxer or the infamous Jerri curl. Natural hair was reserved for children, Rastafarians or extremely religious Christian women. It was not exactly our idea of beautiful hair, unless you had a particular hair type. I don't remember anyone ever saying anything negative about natural hair, yet as a child, I had somehow picked up the message that straight hair was the ideal - getting a relaxer was one rite of passage I couldn't wait to experience.

I got my first relaxer at 13. I had since moved to the United States and was getting ready to start high school. My grandmother and aunts did not like the idea, but I went ahead and did it anyway. I was going to high school I thought, and I needed to "do something with my hair."

I did my first big chop 10 years later at 23. Over the years I had experimented with a lot of different hairstyles. Braids, weaves, short cuts - you name it, I had it. I never in a million years would have thought I would go natural again, but I had moved to Brooklyn, and there were beautiful natural heads around me. It was October 2007 and natural hair was making a big comeback. I wanted to be apart of this movement. At first I was excited. I felt new and empowered, bold even. I received a lot of positive feedback, and I felt good about my natural hair. A few months later, in March 2008 I went to Jamaica to visit relatives. To my dismay, the positive feedback I got in the States did not match the disbelief on my relatives faces. One of my aunts could not understand why I had done something "like that" to my hair, she did not like how it looked "at all." Though I laughed at the comments, they stung. For the first time I began to question my decision.

I had told myself that I wasn't in any way affected by hair politics. It was stupid, I reasoned. I felt somehow I had escaped the brainwashing. I was going to define beauty by my own standards and embrace my kinks. Yet one day as I was getting ready in the bathroom I started to cry. My teeny weeny afro had grown out some and it wasn't cooperating- it did not look the way I thought it should look. At that moment I felt that it looked unruly, untamed and unattractive, and I felt frustrated. At the time I was dating a man who LOVED my natural hair. He was probably my biggest cheerleader on my natural journey. He heard me crying and wanted to know what was wrong, I felt ashamed as I told him I no longer liked my hair. As he tried to cheer me up, I had decided it didn't matter what he said. I did not like it. Unsurprisingly, a few months later I relaxed......

I regretted my decision to relax shortly after. I wondered if I had given my natural hair a real chance. There were still beautiful heads of natural hair around me, I was still inspired so I bc'ed again a few months later. As before, people were supportive, but interestingly when I went to Jamaica after my second big chop the same relatives who spoke negatively about my natural hair in 2008 loved my natural hair in 2010. My cousin told me that Jamaica was also experiencing a natural hair revival. It appeared my relatives were finally catching on. I do not mean to say all Jamaicans have embraced natural hair. We still have a ways to go, like most blacks in the diaspora my fellow Jamaicans were also affected by Eurocentric standards of beauty. The remnants are still very apparent.

I felt a lot better about my natural hair the second time around. I cannot pinpoint a moment to you but somehow my idea of beautiful hair was undergoing a transformation. Small, medium and huge Afros were gorgeous to me. I found natural hair styles regal! It's not that I did not like straight hair. I did, but if I had to choose between natural and relaxed, I would choose a big bodacious fro. Yet, since I have always been a woman who changes hairstyles a lot, I decided to relax my hair again, but this time out of sheer boredom. I felt blah about my decision. I no longer wanted straight hair, it felt......not me. I went natural again, and I am loving it!

I love the beauty and versatility of black women's hair. I love that we can wear our hair relaxed, natural and in a plethora of other styles. I view hair as a style choice, and I think every woman should have the freedom to choose how she wants to wear her hair. I despise divisive hair politics. I simply want natural to be a viable choice. It hurts to look back on my hair experiences and realize that I did not think it was. It hurts to look back and admit that I had negative views about the texture that grew out of my head naturally. Despite what I had told myself, I was not above the brainwashing. A few months ago, I was speaking to my 11 year old cousin about hair. She looked at me and said, "I like it most when your hair is short and curly. " I did not know whether I should smile or cry, but I will always remember those words. When I have a daughter I want her to embrace herself in all forms. Whether she chooses to wear her hair relaxed or natural, I want her view of natural hair to be a positive one. I want her to see natural hair as a viable choice. As natural hair begins to become more commonplace, we are doing just that for the younger generation. We are showing them it's beautiful and that it's a choice.

Since I love versatility it's no telling what my other hairstyle will be, but I am still aiming for that big bodacious fro.

Shortly after March 2011 BC

Sexy, Classy, Feminine

2011-07-26T08:26:00.000-07:00

Bob Mackie: Art Collection

2011-07-22T02:20:00.000-07:00

On Wednesday I had the pleasure of attending "The Art of Bob Mackie" fashion blogger event, which featured a collection of fashion and costume illustrations by Bob Mackie. Emmy Award winning designer Bob Mackie is largely celebrated for his glamorous and innovative designs and has designed for The Carol Burnett Show, Pink, Diana Ross just to name a few. Here are pictures from the event:

W each had a chance to choose a piece, and I chose the piece below. Not only do I love cats, I think this piece has a lot of sass, I can't wait to put it on my wall.

Here I am with Wendy of SassnCurlz

Urban Sophisticate, another one of my faves

Definitely my favorite pieces

Holding the Bob Mackie Press Kit

A special thanks to The Bob Mackie team for hosting such an awesome event!

Dinner With Friends

2011-07-20T04:16:00.000-07:00

I am wearing a vintage dress and BCBG pumps

Subway Moments

2011-07-19T19:37:00.000-07:00

I can be bashful! Like in the case of a cute guy walking on the train. I see him, he sees me, our eyes meet for a second. He looks for a second longer, I look away. He steal glances, I can sense them. I try to steal a glance or two where I catch him looking back. I refuse to make eye contact after that. I am a New Yorker, I have learned subway self-preservation, no eye contact, mind your business, do not invite strangers into your personal space. But he's a cutie, and I am attracted. In the moments I am attracted to a man, I become a blushing teenager. I won't make the first move, I am traditional that way. Yet I don't invite him to make the first move with a look or a smile. I instead choose to look away. Sigh, did I blush?

My Sister is Getting Married!!!!

2011-07-13T20:05:00.000-07:00

It was August 14, 2010, I was in the passenger seat as my friend Sasha drove us to Harlem. My phone rang and my sister's name popped up, I answered and immediately let out a sound of joy...she was engaged!!!!! Her boyfriend (now fiance) had proposed on the beach on their anniversary. My sister was overjoyed, and so was I. I believe God created her and her fiance for each other, he loves my sister and my sister loves him. When you see them together, you see love, you see two people who love and accept each other. More importantly, you see two young people who love God loving each other, and that in itself is a blessing.

In one month my sister will be walking down the aisle,and I am even more excited. I can't wait to see my sister as the beautiful bride I know she will be.

The loving couple

Sissy ;)

10 Things to Do While You Are Single

2011-07-06T19:50:00.000-07:00

It's natural to want love, I don't think there's anything wrong with that, on some level I do believe we all want to experience true love. We all want to be loved for who we are by a person we love in return. For everything there is a time, for everything a season, and while there will be a time where we (hopefully) find that love we crave, there is also a season called singleness.

How will we/are we spending our season of singleness? Going after our dreams? Cultivating our passions? Living life with appreciation? Or are we moping and complaining about the lack of a relationship in our lives? How do you want to look back and remember your single years? How are you spending this season in your life?

I have cultivated a list of things I think every single women should do before she gets married. Singleness affords you the kind of freedom where you can accomplish a whole lot, do you have anything else to add lovelies?

1. Strengthen your faith

2. Travel - there are many different places to see and experiences to be had, now is the time to do it

3. Volunteer

4. Chase your dreams - it's sometimes easier to do this when you don't have to think about a family

5. Live in a new city, if even for a little while

6. Get your financial life in order - now is the time to really cultivate/develop good financial habits

7. Treat yourself to nice things/gifts (like spa days etc. - just because you deserve it)

8. Spend time getting to know and affirm yourself - you will be better equipped entering a relationship knowing who you are and what you want. Affirm yourself and know you bring something valuable to the table.

9. Address past hurts

10. Develop strong meaningful friendships

*smooches, lovelies*

BK Stand UP!

2011-07-03T12:33:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I went to 1st Saturdays at the Brooklyn Museum with my friends. It was packed! I saw a lot of stylish people out and about and there were so many cute men!!!! Like seriously it was a single woman's dream, and me having a thing for Brooklyn accents made it that much better! Well hope you are having a fabulous holiday weekend. *smooches*

Kelly is Wearing this Dress

2011-07-01T17:30:00.000-07:00

Looking like the bronzed beauty that she is, I *heart* it!!!

Summer, Summer, Summer Time!!!!

2011-06-28T16:47:00.000-07:00

Skirt: Forever21

Shoes: Tahari

Top: Banana Republic

Necklace: Forever21

I Love Maxi Dresses

2011-06-26T13:46:00.000-07:00

Where: Studio Museum of Harlem, Uptown Fridays

Dress: Topshop

Zoe Saldana Does it Again

2011-06-25T11:58:00.000-07:00

You guys know I love me some Zoe

Work Style

2011-06-23T19:08:00.000-07:00

In my field, I often try to find a balance between professional and stylish. In any field, I am aware that people must look the part, yet I aim to look the part in a way that allows me to express myself, which a city like New York allows me to do.

Skirt: Forever21
Top: Zara
Shoes: RSVP

Mish Mash -a post about many different things

2011-06-20T19:32:00.000-07:00

I'm a redhead!

Last week I colored my hair red. I usually go for a light brown color, but I wanted something different this time around. I was really nervous it would come out too bright, but I really like it!

Gasp! That's what I did when I saw this picture, she's absolutely gorgeous

New York street vendors - after living outside of NYC for almost 2 years, I'm having a ball finding cute accessories from the best...NYC street vendors. I got these earrings last week

Family - I have been enjoying spending time with my family. My cousin Shyan is a total doll and such a fashionista!

Love - I am feeling quite lovey dovey lately ;)

Boat Ride!!!

2011-06-19T05:45:00.000-07:00

Hey Lovelies,

On Friday night, I went to a boat ride with a few friends. Tons of fun!

I'm wearing:

Forever21 skirt

random brand tank

BCBG shoes

Forever21 clutch

I loved my friend's jumper, she got it at lulus.com

Tweet Tweet

2011-06-16T20:27:00.000-07:00

Hey Lovelies,

I am on twitter!!! follow me @iriechic1.

Besos!

Today's Event

2011-06-15T22:27:00.000-07:00

Today I attended Essence Dark and Lovely Fashionista Model Search, while I didn't participate in the search, I really enjoyed the beauty/style panel discussions featuring Essence's esteemed past Beauty Editor Mikki Taylor. The panel gave tips on hair, makeup, style and confidence ("own your personal style!"). A few photos:

The Crowd

Having fun after the panel discussion

The outfit

Skirt: Express Pencil Skirt

Top: express floral vest, Banana Republic tee

Shoes: Tahari

Bag: O by Oscar de la Renta

Rebecca Minkoff Resort 2012 Presentation

2011-06-14T18:49:00.000-07:00

Last week, I had the honor of attending the Rebecca Minkoff Resort 2012 Presentation (special thanks to Monroe of Fashion Steele NYC for making this a possibility). The collection was awe inspiring to say the least - feminine yet edgy, soft with a touch of tough glam and plenty of color!!! (you guys know I have a penchant for bright colors). This collection is phenomenal - after all it was inspired by 1970's St. Tropez France, need I say more. Here are some pictures from the presentation courtesy of www.rebeccaminkoff.com.

This bag is one of my absolute faves!!!

These shoes are show stoppers

Gorg! Sexy summer power suit

Rebecca looked absolutely beautiful!

Here I am pictured with some of the lovely members of the New York Fashion Bloggers meetup group

Weekend Wear

2011-06-12T06:20:00.000-07:00

In DC for the weekend.....

hope you guys are having a wonderful wknd!!!!

Dress: Forever 21

Shoes: Steve Madden

Funky Feet

2011-06-08T08:46:00.000-07:00

I purchased these shoes at DSW a little over a week ago, they are by Poetic License, love them!

College Reunion

2011-06-05T22:05:00.000-07:00

Five years ago, I graduated from Columbia University,( it just doesn't seem that long ago!) and last night I reunited with my graduating class to reminisce and update each other on our lives. In five years so many things have changed. Yet I will never forget the formative years I spent at Columbia, that period in my life I came of age in New York City. It was a time of tremendous growth, which was sometimes accompanied by growing pains, but enough to overshadow the awesome memories from that time. Significantly, it was during this time period I really started to hone my signature style. Here are some pictures from last night:

Here I am with my friend Alicia, who authors her awesome mommy blog, Mommy Delicious (while she wasn't able to make the reunion, I also have another blogger classmate and friend who is the co-founder and Fashion Editor of The Glamazons)

Boston...

2011-05-29T09:06:00.000-07:00

I am visiting one of my besties who lives in Boston for the weekend. We are currently getting ready to go to the beach. We spent the day out on Newbury Street yesterday then went to a birthday party. Here are a few pics:

Be Back Shortly.....

2011-05-24T20:50:00.000-07:00

Settling into my summer job and New York, still unpacking, unwinding and getting my life together. Will be back shortly (like this weekend). Stay tuned.....

Rock it Again....

2011-05-20T18:47:00.000-07:00

The past couple of days have been spent catching up with friends and getting ready to start work next week. I went up to NY for a training but came back to the DMV to finalize moving for the summer. Today I discovered this great vintage hop on U Street named Rock it Again! What a gem. They have the coolest collection of vintage shoes. Check out their website here The owner also allowed me to snap a few pictures in sotre here goes:

A few pictures of me form the last couple of days

currently having a love affair with feather earrings.

with friends at Eatonville in DC

Old School Reggae

2011-05-19T17:53:00.000-07:00

I love, love, love old school reggae, check out dome of my favorite old school reggae tunes below

Good Day!

2011-05-17T17:55:00.000-07:00

So I am officially done with my second year of law school, if you guys could see me, you'd see that I have a huge smile on my face. I am soooooooooooo ecstatic you guys!!!!! Right now I am packing to go to New York, training for my summer job starts tomorrow! Yes it's a busy time. Today I was featured on Coco & Creme. Please check out my feature here

A Lesson From Justin

2011-05-13T13:50:00.000-07:00

It was a Saturday night, I was out with my cousin Paula at a party in London. I was 20 years old, spending my spring semester studying abroad. Away from home and from my comfort zone, I felt renewed, fresh and ready for new beginnings. My cousin and I headed toward the basement where they were playing reggae music, it was dark and packed down there. At 20 I had less qualms about meeting a man in the club, nowadays I am more weary- experience has taught me it’s not the best place to meet quality guys. I scanned the room and mentally noted that I did not see anyone of interest, so I nursed my drink and engaged in my conversation with my cousin. After all we were just recently introduced to each other. This was the essence of my night, until I got a slight tap on my shoulder. I turned around and was quite pleased. Standing before me was tall dark and handsome, right away I noticed he had the high cheek bones typical of men from West Africa. I smiled.

His name was Justin, like me he loved to read. He was a writer from Harlem visiting family in London for a few months. I asked Justin about his writing and we immediately fell into a very engaging conversation about James Baldwin, Zora Neale Hurtson and our favorite authors from the Harlem Renaissance. It’s quite profound that I remember the details of our conversation, but if I had a list of top conversations I’ve had, this one would be included on that list. Here we were, 2 people in a club, discussing books and authors. I was so engaged! I thought this man was so smart, so interesting and we talked non-stop. During the conversation, I would find out Justin was 39 and to “his dismay” he realized I was only 20. Nevertheless we exchanged numbers, and near the end of the night Justin said to me, “I was attracted to you physically when I saw you, but now I am even more attracted to you because of your intelligence and your mind.”

Justin called me a few days later to see an exhibition with him at the national gallery. We found out we both loved art, and he told me I just had to see this exhibition. When I arrived, he presented me with a gift - a book by James Baldwin and a box set of Billie Holiday’s music. An avid jazz lover, Justin told me it was imperative I owned Ms. Holiday’s CDs. I was touched and impressed. After the gallery, we sat down to talk a little bit. He again reiterated his disappointment that I was only one-half his age. He wished I was a bit older. He was ready to settle down and have children, I was clearly in a different phase in my life. Though I did not mind the age difference, looking back I understand and appreciate him for being a man of integrity, a man who never once tried to take advantage of my youthful naivete.

During my time in London Justin remained in contact, but he remained extremely respectful mindful of the age difference between us. We often engaged in long conversations about life, books, music, art, philosophy politics etc. I also got the chance to read some of his work, and was impressed when on online search would lead me to discover he was published and had quite the impressive resume. How humble of him not to have told me all these things I thought.

After leaving London, Justin and I kept in touch via e-mail sporadically. The last time I saw him, I bumped into him in Grand Central station. He was with friends and they were on there way to a conference. Life happens, and somehow we lost contact, but I never forgot the lesson he taught me. Over the years, I have experienced relationship ups and downs. In an effort to understand some of the downs, I sought advice from different sources. One of the reoccurring themes I noticed was the concept of “dumbing down” to preserve a man’s ego. Some relationship experts believe that sometimes women need to hide their views, thoughts, opinions and ideas to attract/keep a man. Gender dynamics, they argue, demands that a woman play a particular role in relationships, a role where she is not a threat to male sensitivities. Unfortunately there were times when I bought into this concept.

We live and we learn, and sometimes we don’t see the lesson in an experience until later; but what I learned from Justin that night was to allow my light, my true self to shine. Here was someone who appreciated my mind, my views,and my ideas. Someone I engaged in countless hours of conversation with, someone who allowed me to express my true self. If there is one thing I remember feeling (along with attraction) was a sense of freedom. I like that freedom - the freedom to express and be myself, it’s a beautiful feeling. I have discarded the advice from those “experts.” No one, should demand that you to dim your light in order to be with them. In fact they should encourage you to shine, to express and to share. What good is any relationship if it does not help you to grow and allow you to express your views, gifts and talent.

Looking back I am glad I learned that lesson from Justin.

with friends in London, Circa 2005

Spring/Summer Lips

2011-05-10T10:29:00.000-07:00

I really love this makeup video and youtuber and just wanted to share with you lovely ladies. I am really going to buy a few of these colors, really want to try the coral lipstick.

Waiting.....

2011-05-09T19:23:00.000-07:00

for finals to be over so the fun can begin, even more excited because I live me spending my summer in New York :)

Vintage Blazer

Banana republic Cami

Vintage Oxfords

Madewell pants

Springy

2011-05-03T22:06:00.000-07:00

I am in the midst of finals, busy as a bee!!!! Today I took a quick minute to snap these pictures of my outfit:

Vintage Blazer

Forever 21 Skirt

Banana Republic Top

Beauty

2011-04-30T13:46:00.000-07:00

A picture can speak a thousand words, and they can also bring forth a number of feelings, hopes and dreams.

Easter Edition

2011-04-25T18:01:00.000-07:00

Yesterday's Easter Sunday Outfit

Dress: Banana Republic

Shoes: BCBG

Necklace: Topshop